charmed, I'm sure. All the pictures of the antichrist as a wicked evil-looking guy are as incorrect as our expectations of a serial killer. When you look at Jeffrey Dahmer or Ted Bundy, you might even find them handsome. Just like a fish looks at the worm hanging off the hook, you see no evil. That is the lure of the devil, to lull you into complacency so you take the bait and then he sets the hook.......
I met him at work but he invited me to church. I thought that AT LEAST in this environment I'd find a man with a good heart, dedicated to living a life for the LORD. But in church is where we run into the wounded....some who truly seek healing but many who seek to transfer their pain onto others.
How kind he seemed when I first met him. Handsome, playing the guitar in the church band, inviting me to come and visit during rehearsals. The other people in the band encouraged me to try and play percussion - and I became like Linda McCartney in the band. He was critical of my playing...never mind that others found me to be inspiring as I lost myself in worship. Even with my inexperience I was expected to be perfect in one try. Just one of many hints at his expectations of perfection for a woman.....
My most awesome experience was that he invited his former lover to come and sing in the band as well. He could be the "christian rock star" surrounded by those women he had influenced to come to the holy house. It was a notch in his belt of christian converts, surely the more he had the better place he would occupy in heaven. "LOOK AT ME GOD, am I not a good little boy, bringing YOU these fallen women, these whores, these witches?" A competition in christian brownie points! I prayed so hard to no longer have feelings of inadequacy and jealousy as he walked to the dining room with his former lover, and I, his current sheep, walking behind in her rightful position of obedience. An amazing miracle occurred later on as I was delivered of the demonic lies I had come to believe in my 43 years of life. Oh how I burned as I became free!
Now I know that I am loved! I am a child of the KING and NO ONE can tell me that I have no value. YESHUA valued me so much that HE died for me, and for you and yes, even for the vicious deceiver who is your accuser. There is no greater, sweeter love than YESHUA'S love. All the attempts of making me feel unloved, unworthy, imperfect, vile, fat, or ugly were in vain. It actually became funny to watch the pharisee's frustration trying to accuse me of the things he himself was guilty of. I was like a duck letting the accusations run like water off my back. Submit to the LORD, resist the devil and he will flee from you JAMES 4:7
I've been examining lots of blogs from women who have fallen for the same deceit and treachery as I have. I know I have felt so stupid for trusting, but it is not my sin. It is the sin of the deceiver who takes your trust and tries to use it for his own gratification and selfish purposes. It saddens me that there are so many men out there who are that way.
In a home or community or nation where its woman are not treated with respect, dignity and honor, there can be no prosperity. Where the woman is degraded, demeaned, and disrespected, there is violence with a focus on power, not on passion. I live on the border of Texas and Juarez, Mexico. In the last ten years there have been over 400 unsolved murdered women found - how many are unknown? And now the drug cartel wars are claiming thousands of lives. Is there prosperity in our community? No. And there cannot be if we do not address abuse in our homes against our women.
The church has too long been quiet on this topic. It is all the "Sunday game face" they want to see. Heaven forbid they have any REAL issues in their midst. There was once a time that I was bitter. I read somewhere that bitterness is like drinking poison and hoping someone else will die from it. Is that not true for us who so long hoped our deceiver would change?
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